What Is Imposter Syndrome, and Why Does It Feel So Real?

You just got the promotion. Or the client said yes. Or someone called your work brilliant. And instead of feeling good, you feel a low-grade dread, like they’ll figure it out soon enough.

That feeling has a name. And if you’ve felt it, you already know that telling yourself “just accept the compliment” doesn’t do much. The feeling doesn’t live in the part of you that responds to logic. It lives somewhere much older and much harder to reach.

Imposter syndrome is the persistent feeling of being a fraud despite real evidence of competence. It’s not a character flaw or a confidence problem. It’s a deeply patterned nervous system response, often rooted in early experience. Counselling can help by addressing what the body is holding, not just the stories the mind tells.

What Is the Imposter Phenomenon, Really?

The feeling of being a fraud despite real accomplishment isn’t a clinical diagnosis. It doesn’t appear in the DSM. But that doesn’t make it any less real or any less worth taking seriously.

The term was coined by psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes in 1978, originally to describe high-achieving women who, despite obvious accomplishments, believed they were frauds and feared being exposed. Since then, research has expanded the picture considerably. A 2025 narrative review in Middle East Current Psychiatry describes it as “an internalized sense of intellectual deceit and persistent self-doubt, even in the presence of clear competence.”

It tends to cluster around a few recognisable patterns: dismissing success as luck, believing you’ve fooled everyone around you, dreading that one mistake will expose the “truth,” over-preparing to cover for assumed inadequacy, and feeling like you don’t deserve the room you’re in. These aren’t random. They share a root. And that root isn’t a lack of skill.

Why Does This Pattern of Self-Doubt Affect Women Disproportionately?

Research consistently shows that women report higher rates of this kind of chronic self-doubt than men, particularly in professional and academic settings. A 2024 paper in JETIR documented the pattern in women navigating major professional transitions. Studies going back decades point to the same finding: the phenomenon is especially tenacious for women in high-achieving environments.

Part of this is socialization. Girls are often taught to be modest, to not take up too much space, to attribute success to external factors rather than their own ability. When you grow up in that environment, competence can start to feel almost presumptuous, like something that needs to be justified again and again.

There’s also what researchers call the “prove it again” dynamic. Even when women achieve, they often receive less credit, face more scrutiny, and have to demonstrate ability more frequently than male peers in similar roles. That external reality feeds the internal narrative. If the world around you seems unconvinced, staying convinced yourself is hard.

And then there’s perfectionism, a close companion to feelings of fraudulence. The belief that any visible flaw will shatter the illusion. The exhausting maintenance of a flawless surface. The two tend to reinforce each other in a loop that’s genuinely difficult to break from the outside in.

Is Imposter Syndrome a Nervous System Problem?

Here’s a reframe I find useful with clients: the feeling of being a fraud is often not a confidence problem. It’s a nervous system response to visibility.

When being seen has historically been unsafe — when praise was followed by criticism, when success drew unwanted attention, when being “too much” was a liability — the nervous system learns to treat visibility as a threat. Not metaphorically. Physiologically. The body braces. The heart rate shifts. The internal alarm goes off.

This is why self-doubt of this kind so often has a physical quality: a tightening in the chest when someone compliments your work, a kind of nauseated dread before a presentation, the urge to shrink after a win. The body is doing what it learned to do. It’s protecting you from something it once knew to be dangerous.

A 2024 scoping review in Frontiers in Psychology found that existing interventions largely focus on cognitive approaches, but identified significant gaps, particularly in addressing the deeper, embodied dimensions of the phenomenon. That gap is exactly where somatic work lives.

Research from NCBI/StatPearls notes that this pattern is closely linked to anxiety, perfectionism, and chronic self-doubt, a cluster of experiences that are all, at their core, about a nervous system that doesn’t feel safe enough to rest in its own worth.

What Actually Helps: A Somatic Approach to Counselling for Self-Doubt

A lot of the advice out there for the imposter phenomenon is cognitive. Notice the thought. Challenge it. Replace it with something more accurate. That can help, up to a point. But if the feeling is rooted in the body, in a nervous system pattern that’s been running since before you had words for it, reframing the thought doesn’t always reach the source.

In my practice in Kelowna, BC, I work with this kind of self-doubt somatically. That means we slow down and notice what’s happening in the body when the feeling gets activated. Where do you feel it? What happens physically when someone acknowledges your work? Can you tolerate the sensation of being seen? As a Registered Clinical Counsellor (RCC) trained in Somatic Experiencing, I’ve found that this kind of body-centred attention can start to shift the nervous system’s learned response. The goal isn’t to convince the body that you deserve success. It’s to build new experiences of visibility that feel safe.

The relational dimension matters too. A lot of self-doubt of this kind is about not feeling witnessed accurately. When a therapeutic relationship offers something genuinely different, consistent, warm, non-evaluative attention, that experience itself becomes part of the change. The body learns, over time, that being seen doesn’t have to mean bracing.

This isn’t a quick fix. But it tends to be a more durable one. Clients often say that after working this way, the feelings don’t disappear entirely. They just stop running the show.

What Can You Do on Your Own?

You don’t have to wait for a counselling session to start getting curious about what’s happening. A few things I often suggest to clients in Kelowna and across BC:

When you receive praise or accomplish something and notice a sinking or constricting feeling, try pausing before you dismiss it or explain it away. Put a hand on your chest. Ask: what is this? Not to fix it. Just to notice.

Try separating the feeling from the fact. “I feel like a fraud” is a feeling. It’s not the same as “I am a fraud.” Feelings are data. They’re not always accurate reports on reality.

Notice where you track your worth. If your sense of okayness rises and falls entirely based on performance, feedback, or how much you got done today, that’s worth getting curious about. Worth isn’t something you earn. Most of us were taught that it is, and unlearning that takes real time and attention.

These aren’t solutions. They’re starting points. And sometimes a starting point is enough to begin.

Frequently Asked Questions About Imposter Syndrome

What are the main signs of imposter syndrome?

The most common signs include attributing your success to luck or timing rather than your own ability, dreading that a mistake will expose you as incompetent, over-preparing to hide perceived inadequacy, and feeling out of place even when you have the credentials and experience to be there. Many people describe a persistent sense of waiting for the other shoe to drop after something goes well.

Is imposter syndrome the same as low self-esteem?

They often overlap, but they’re not identical. Low self-esteem tends to be more global, a general sense of not being good enough across most areas of life. The imposter phenomenon is more context-specific, often activated in high-achievement situations. You can have relatively healthy self-esteem in most of your life and still experience significant self-doubt at work or in a new role.

Does imposter syndrome go away on its own?

For some people, it softens over time as they accumulate more experience. For many, it persists regardless of how much they achieve, or actually intensifies as the stakes get higher. Without some kind of deliberate attention, whether through therapy, self-reflection, or shifting context, the underlying pattern tends to stay in place.

Why is this kind of self-doubt more common in women?

Research points to a combination of socialization, systemic bias, and the “prove it again” dynamic many women face professionally. Women are often taught to attribute success to external factors and to minimise their achievements. When that internal pattern meets external environments that also tend to underestimate women, the feeling of fraudulence gets reinforced from both directions.

Can counselling help with imposter syndrome?

Yes. A 2024 scoping review in Frontiers in Psychology found that a range of interventions show promise, including self-compassion work, somatic approaches, and relational therapy. What works best depends on where the feeling is rooted. If it has a strong body component, somatic therapy often gets further than cognitive approaches alone.

How is imposter syndrome different from anxiety?

They’re related and often co-occur. Anxiety is a broader experience of worry, dread, or nervous system activation across many situations. The imposter phenomenon is more specifically about the fear of being exposed as incompetent or fraudulent. Many people with chronic self-doubt also have anxiety, and working with one often helps the other.

How long does it take to work through imposter syndrome in therapy?

It varies. Some clients notice a meaningful shift in a handful of sessions, particularly once they start understanding the nervous system piece. For others, especially when the pattern is deeply rooted in early experience, it’s more gradual. Six to twelve sessions is a reasonable horizon for initial change, with many people choosing to continue longer.

Can men experience imposter syndrome too?

Yes. While women report it at higher rates, the imposter phenomenon is not exclusive to women. It’s common in men who are first-generation professionals, people from marginalised groups entering majority-dominated fields, and anyone navigating a new role or level of visibility they haven’t held before.

What’s the difference between imposter syndrome and perfectionism?

They’re closely linked but distinct. Perfectionism is the belief that anything less than flawless is failure. The imposter phenomenon is the belief that you’re fundamentally not qualified, regardless of how well you perform. Perfectionism often fuels the imposter feeling, and many clients carry both. They tend to feed each other.

Is there a somatic approach to treating imposter syndrome in Kelowna?

Yes. As an RCC with Somatic Experiencing training, I work with imposter syndrome by helping clients notice and shift the nervous system patterns underneath the feeling of fraudulence. Sessions are available in-person in Kelowna and West Kelowna, and virtually to anyone in British Columbia.